It's been about a year friends. Since I had the best haircut of my life. The Mullet. It was... everything that defined the term... epic.Today is a day of reflection for me.
I mean... it took the better part of a year to grow it. That was the rough part. For those who know me real well... I'm not a very patient man. Sure I'm as happy go lucky as the next dude... but patience is not a virtue for me. Personally, I was surprised I hung with it... as long as I did.
It sure was a great haircut. I mean... look at the picture above. Look how it just flows right out of a hat. That coupled with mean ass facial hair? It's an effing solid look.
I miss it.
From the times when friends would say, "Hey, what's with your hair?" And the high fives that would follow when I replied, "I'm growing a Mullet, dude." Or bumping in to pals and people I deal with on a day to day basis... "Hey G$, that Mullet sure is startin' to look, really nice!"
One thing I learned one year ago is what this haircut's capabilities were. I mean.... Dudes... You could bring Peace with this thing... Bring some joy to this World. I'd run into someone, having a bad day... and then they would see my magnificent mane and be like, "Dude's rocking a mullet. Everything is gonna be alright. Everything is gonna be alright."
I never get into fights while I'm out and about. I'm a lover, not a hater. But once I rocked a mullet? I was stopping bar fights. This is when I knew...
Met up after work with some good pals. Out west at some suburban joint... We just sat down to grab a beverage... and basically WCW Monday Nitro was about to happen over by the pool table. You know how these things start. Probably some guy was talking to some dude's girl... and that don't work good a lot of times in those parts.
Choice words were exchanged. The pushing and shoving began... then the dudes were grabbing bar stools. This is when the Mullet took over. I snapped. I was like hell nah. I was out to watch a game and hang with my pals. I wasn't about to have cage match interrupt my evening or anyone else's.
I walked up to the dudes and yelled, "DUDES!" Joint went completely silent. I had their attention. Via the power of the mullet... the next words just flowed out of my mouth, "Hug it out, bitches."
My friends thought I was nuts. But I was starting to learn the power. The dudes who were ready to go Dusty Rhodes on each other's asses... looked at me... first with death glares... then they saw the hair... those glares turned to a look of shame as they looked at the ground. After a 10 seconds of silence later... One of them spoke up in a raspy voice, "The dude in the sweet hair is right. Can I buy you a beer, buds?" They hugged it out and shook hands.
I just looked at them, nodded my head and said, "This is good." And walked back across the joint to our table... that's when "Back in Black" cranked up on the jukebox... the good times rolled on.
There are witnesses. This is a true story.
I'm telling you guys. This was a regular occurrence when I had the mullet. Bringing awesome to everywhere I went. How couldn't you? When you are rocking the most important haircut in our Nation's history... you just do it.
One year ago... the business on top and party in the back was a special time for me. I think back today... remembering... thinking... and smiling. That was some pretty sweet hair if I do say so myself. In my day of reflection... I will always remember.... It was a great time.... the time of my life... errr... the best haircut of my life. Someone que the Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes. Stay thirsty my friends.
