CHRIS FOWLER: Live, on the new ridiculous death trap in street redesign that is Ingersoll Avenue… We’re at Tim Flanagan’s Restaurant and Lounge… It’s that time of year, so it’s QCI Primary Gameday. I’m Chris Fowler. In less than a week… the polls will be open. But the scheming and strategery continues. With me as always Kirk Herbstreit and Lee Corso. Fellas, welcome back.
KIRK HERBSTREIT: Chris, what a different a year and a half makes. I’m pumped.
LEE CORSO: Couldn’t have said it better my friend. One week to go!
FOWLER: A little change up in our programming this week. Since this is one of the bigger primary seasons we have witnessed in a while. We’re doing a three post event here for Primary Gameday.
CORSO: Three post event! That G$ sure is crazy.
HERBSTREIT: Coach, I believe epic is what you’re trying to say.
FOWLER: Epic indeed, Kirk. And since we’re dragging this into three. We thought we’d add some extra help to the show. QCI-ders, via satellite, welcome legendary analyst Beano Cook.
BEANO COOK: Great to be here. I haven’t been this excited since I was named honorary chaperone to the USC Song Girls at South Bend in ‘67. Only to have my mojo stolen by that blasted Orenthal James fellow.
FOWLER: Still not over that, huh Beano?
BEANO: Damn you to hell OJ Simpson.
FOWLER: Alright then. Today we’ll cover the statewide candidates. As you all know the executive council… as it’s called, are all up this year. The Rs control 2 of these offices. Auditor of State, Dave Vaudt… and Secretary of Agriculture Bill Northey. These guys have really made a good base point for republicans to take back the other 6 offices. Quick thoughts on these great leaders?
HERBSTREIT: Bill Northey, this guy is everywhere and he doesn’t even have a primary. Every event I go, Northey is there smiling and shaking hands. He is the nicest guy on the ticket, if you don’t like Nothey you are probably a communist.
CORSO: Kirk! We agree! Bill will campaign hard for down ballot and to solidify his position. Solid, solid leader.
HERBSTREIT: He sure is, Coach. The Democrats have dredged up another organic fanatic pretend farmer to run against a real Iowa farmer. This will be an interesting match up as the Greenpeace types line with the D who no one knows and John Deere green types line up with the only real farmer in the race.
BEANO: I love the gold and green, like Notre Dame in 1973, although I swear I have seen that Northey logo before.
FOWLER: No real disagreements here on this one. Northey is just good at what he does. And everyone’s favorite Watch Dog is up this year….
BEANO: Ruff, Ruff, Ruff, wait… I wasn’t referencing David Vaudt, this is just what I like to do on a late Thursday night after going into the casual encounters section of Craigslist in a cheap hotel.
[Fowler, Herbstreit and Corso all with disturbed looks on their faces]
FOWLER: Uh… yeah. The Watch Dog, Auditor Dave Vaudt. Kirk, your take?
HERBSTREIT: STILL the only CPA in the race, infact guys he is the only person in the race. You can’t out dress him and you can’t beat him, heck you can’t even find someone to run against him.
CORSO: No Kirk, they cannot! No challenger, no problem, will help down ballot races.
FOWLER: Only one of the challengers in the statewides… without a primary is Brenna Findley. She has built quite the following. Impressive fundraising numbers. Is she going to be the mayor of Upset City this fall, Coach?
CORSO: Awe HA! Chris! Love her! Keep an eye on this one, she’s got fire! Kirk, we were just talking about her.
HERBSTREIT: We agree again, Coach. Move over Sarah Palin there is a new darling of the Iowa Conservatives and this one knows where Russia is. Where to start. Brenna is a homeschooled Iowa girl who worked as Congressman Steve King’s Chief of Staff. Translation: She is a rock solid conservative with natural ties with two of the hardest working networks. She got her law degree from the University of Chicago, routinely one of the top 5 schools in the Nation. She also managed to out raise Good ‘Ol Tom Miller SEVERAL times over. Brenna raked in an eye-popping $124K crushing Miller’s $15K. Tom’s got a problem and we got a candidate to give him fits. The feisty lawyer from Dexter has given Republican’s the best hope since Miller took office approximately one year after the last ice age.
BEANO: What would make her candidacy better? If she got her law degree from the University of Notre Dame. But she may have it better. A law degree from a Big Ten school.
FOWLER: Wondered how long until we’d get an old school Big Ten reference out of you Beano.
BEANO: As G$ says for you people in Story City who didn’t catch that. The University of Chicago was a founding member of the Big Ten.
FOWLER: Thanks for clarifying that Beano. On to races where we have actual primaries in these statewides.... State Treasurer. Coach, you get first stab on this one.
CORSO: A real opportunity for a Republican general election pick up here for State Treasurer. we have a couple good guys running for the chance. In the east end zone we have Jim Heavens the “Mayor from a town where the tax rates went down.” And at midfield we have Republican County All-Star Dave Jamison. Heavens loaned himself the money and has been on the radio and to boot he has a great low name ID name, who doesn’t want to pull the lever for Heaven’s sake. But, not so fast my friend!
HERBSTREIT: Here it comes…
CORSO: Story County Treasurer Dave Jamison has done a lot around the state organizing county officials for years. Dave is very well known and liked in the Republican Party and has the endorsements to prove it. I have to think that wins the day for Jamison and immediately will put State Treasurer Fitzgerald on upset alert. But I’ll tell you this, Heavens is a smart guy and a good Republican prospect, don’t be surprised to see him again down the road.
FOWLER: Upset alert. I like it. Kirk?
HERBSTREIT: Chris, I dub this race, the Marine vs. the Mayor. First, Jim Heavens. This guy is no dummy. DR. Jim Evans has a phd in Agriculture and did a heck of a job as the Mayor of Dyersville, as Coach said, “he’s the Mayor of the town where the tax rates went down.” Also, home of the slightly more notable Field of Dreams.
FOWLER: If you build it, will they vote?
HERBSTREIT: Getting to that Chris. Enter Dave Jamison. I know Beano will have more on this… But… OK… I will admit I didn’t know as much about Jamison as I thought. Not only a Story county Treasurer but also a former Marine with a Masters in Finance.
BEANO: Hell yes.
HERBSTREIT: The Race. Heavens has a little over 30K on hand almost all of it from a loan. Jamison has been everywhere and has raised over 30K the way you want to see it done. Lots of small donors. He also served on the Republican State Central Committee. Jamison has the advantages and the fundamentals down. It’s going to take more than some Kevin Kostner magic outta Dyersville to beat the Marine from Ames. What say you Beano?
BEANO: Like a pre-op Transvestite, I’m just going to pull this out really fast here. I go with Jamison, and only because you don’t eff with a Marine, much the same way you didn’t mess with the 1959 Iowa Hawkeyes.
[Fowler, Herbstreit and Corso with very disturbed looks on their faces.]
FOWLER: Uh… So I guess the consensus is… Jameson because of his statewide network. Makes sense to me, but I think you’re right Coach. This isn’t the last time we’ll see this mayor.
CORSO: Let’s hope so Chris. We have a lot of great people running this year.
FOWLER: Absolutely right, Coach. For our final pick of the day… the last of the statewides… Secretary of State. A couple of new faces and one very familiar one. Kirk, you have a lot of notes on this.
HERBSTREIT: This is probably the most exciting primary on the ballot. Other than the Gubernatorial and 3rd congressional district, and second congressional district, and 1st congressional district. Ok, this race has been lower profile but these guys are squaring off for an important position and a tough fight with SOS Mike Mauro.
You got it all here folks. George Eichhorn is on the ballot… again… and could have an advantage from running two years ago in the Senate Primary which he lost to Chris Reed. Eichhorn, who’s name I can’t spell even though he has been running for office almost as long as BVP hasn’t raised much money and only has $2600 on hand. I’m not sure what he has been spending it on, but its not gonna be enough.
FOWLER: They’re a little sensitive on the name thing over at Team I-Corn… errr Eichhorn.
HERBSTREIT: Just a little, Chris. Then there’s the kid. Matt Shultz, a 30 year old city councilman from Council Bluffs. Matt has been a solid activist in Western Iowa but new to the scene as a candidate. Shultz hasn’t raised much dough either but taking a peek at his expenditures is interesting. Lots of central committees on there. Whats that mean? This guy is all over the place. We’ve seen him at events all over the state and he is always working the room introducing himself.
Finally, Chris Sanger, Love the enthusiasm. Small business owner and clearly best facial hair on among the down ballot races, but Chris shave the beard and raise your profile a little. Did I mention shave the beard.
CORSO: Love that beard!
BEANO: I love the beard of Chris Sanger, and any man who resembles the Gentleman Ghost at his wedding has Beano intrigued, but beards and top hats don’t always make for a happy boy on Election Day. Speaking of guys named Chris, a Chris I think we can all agree on as being a walking, fornicating, and defecating mad Mo Fo is that Zorich kid from Notre Dame, that man had arms like a Zeus and an mean attitude of waitress that got stiffed her tip by a drunk Freshman at Perkins
[An even more disturbed looked on the faces of Fowler, Herbstreit and Corso]
HERBSTREIT: Um…. Yeah…. This is race between old and new, and while I love George I’m gonna go with the hard working young buck who’s name can be spelled with ease. Coach, why don’t you bring us home on this one.
CORSO: Chris! All I can keep thinking is… Eichhorn and Finkle, Finckle and Eichhorn, Eichhorn is Finkle? Is this the same Eichhorn that was in a statewide primary last cycle? Its déjà vu all over again. Councilman Schultz has a nice web ad out but the problem is… it’s a web ad, old primary voting grandpas and grandmas don’t know how to use those interwebs. I have heard there is a third candidate, Chris Sanger, who? I said Chris Sanger… Sanger? I hardly know her! Sanger’s campaign slogan is “He will vote the way people want” I don’t know about where you come from Beano but in Iowa the Secretary of State doesn’t do much voting. This is a bit of a hat grab situation, like the Senate primary in ’08 most don’t know much about any of them, but when ‘the people vote the way they want’ in this election it is going to be Finkle and Eichhorn this time by a close but comfortable margin over Councilman Schultz.
FOWLER: I guess you could say, beards, the young guy and still can pronounce the name is your takes. Alright, that wraps up for today. Tune in next time as we take on the Congressional races.